DOMINIC SPINELLI

Usually a wicket-keeper (well he wears the gloves). Increasingly trying his arm out as a leg-spinner to ‘scattered’ fields. Specialises in dropping catches off his Dad’s bowling.

Nickname:                                                Cymbals, Sicknote

Family links to cricket:                              None

Favourite au revoir:                                 Bye Bye

Headware:                                              Tramp-like tea-cosy

Musical ability:                                        None

Career highlight:                                     Any time I bat with Keith. Anything else is downhill from there.

Tour expectations:                                  Pegging Stewart 5 times a night

Batting style:                                           Attacking middle order. Loves to hook for six and run everyone, including myself out

Bowling style:                                         Sensational leg spin, which occasionally bounces just the once

Least Fave TV:                                       Dick & Dom

Cricketing heroes:                                   Keith. He’s different gravy

Wheels:                                                  Wicked. But have to make sure I park it out of range of Eddie                        

Likes:                                                      Running crazy singles, twos or even threes.

Dislikes:                                                  Wicket-keeping

Fave music:                                            In some band, they’re shit I know.

Hobbies:                                                 Plucking

Often mistaken for:                                 Badly Drawn Boy

Superstitions:                                         Wear ridiculous hat to all matches to cover up my dreadful haircut

Hairstyle:                                                Atrocious and self-administered

Body shape:                                           Slowly fattening up

Fielding position:                                   Wears large gloves, nobody knows why

Shots in locker:                                       Good on the pull, but only on the cricket field

Lovelife:                                                 Previously a barren wasteland (“just like Dingers”) but now improved (“just like Keithy”)

Injuries:                                                  Totally injury prone. Will get injured just saying the word, “injured”.